I’ve always felt strongly about the title of “intersectional feminist” because it’s allowed me to find like-minded individuals to talk to about issues of gender and race. Seeing as how I was not sexually active at the point when I decided to do so (and it didn’t really effect my love life one way or the other at first), I didn’t feel like there was any validity to the “he’s just a straight cis guy trying to look cool to get laid” argument that had been used against me by a few white girls.
But since I’ve started dating more, I’ve been told by a lot of girls that that’s the main reason they decided to go out with me……and something about that feels icky…… I mean I guess I kinda do that to a degree, but I usually weigh other factors as well. It kinda feels like “hey, this guy is really not very notable or attractive other then the fact that he’s a black male who identifies as feminist”. And now it sorta makes me feel like that title is doing exactly what I don’t want it to do.
I dunno, it’s late and I’m tired. Am I just being whiny? Is it just a natural issue of online dating? Should I try not putting it out there at first and maybe bringing it up after someone has already decided I’m cool?